Ambitions

Today, fen fen and I had buffet lunch at Marriott Cafe. They have this promotion whereby a lady get a complimentary lunch buffet if she bring a guy along. Have to make a table reservation and it was almost fully booked till end of July when I made the call to the restaurant in late June. Thank God we got a table cos the promotion will be over by the end of July.

The spread of food was superb especially the desserts. There was so many to choose from and my plate was like a mountain of bits of cakes from here and there. Love the raspberry cake! Simply unforgettable. My favourite is the fried fish platter which resembles so much like the one from Long John Silver but slightly smaller in size. Maybe Long John should copy the idea from them. Heh.

Over lunch, we talked about what we wanted to be before we end up where we are now. My initial ambition was to be a pilot. It was inspired by my classmate who always talked to me about how great and honourable it was to be a fighter pilot. Since I was very influenced by my peers and have not much of a mind of my own then, I took his ambition as my own. Well, ever since I wore glasses in Pri 2, I just put the whole pilot dream behind me.

In Sec Sch, I thought of being a film director. The common immediate response from my boy school friends was "You wanna film R-rated movies right? Must be it la!" and then laugh their silly heads off. Oh com'on. Being the actor is much better than being the stupid director shouting "CUT!!!" and "ACTION!!!" right? My wish was to do a genre of romantic comedy film. Like the nice warm feeling of seeing a happy ending for those who are in love with each other and making it funny makes the movie even more enjoyable. Maybe I could come up with the script as well since I'm quite an imaginative person. Fen realised my hidden talent when she saw how well I drew with my eyes closed as we were playing Cranium at Settler's Cafe. She managed to guess the thermometer I drew with my eyes shut but not the boxer shorts. Anyway, that was what I hope to do if I can't make it to JC and miraculously I made it to JC all thanks to the grace of God. To survive in the film industry in S'pore is really really hard but I really hope to do a film that is of my own.

When I was in JC, I thought being an Accountant cos accountancy to me may be my cup of tea. Furthermore I realised that I can earn big bucks being one. All thanks to my GP grade, I didn't even try applying for the Accoutancy course in NTU. Anyway, my A level subjects isn't that fantastic. I fail my GP and even to get a place in NUS was something I didn't expect happen. I got in with my first choice in Arts & Social Sciences.

As I was completing my Arts degree, I was thinking what shall I do after I graduate. Shall I be a teacher? NO WAY MAN. Now teachers are burdened with so much work which I think is too much. Furthermore, their teaching profession is not considered as any kind of working experience unless they wanna switch to working for private tutoring agency. Maybe it's just not the kind of job for me. No passion for teaching.

I wanted to be a farmer. I prefer manuel work to deskbound job. No office politics. Just me and the scarecrow. And the pigs and hens and chicks. But it's not gonna be possible in S'pore cos they would rather employ a foreign worker than a Arts degree holder to do the dirty work. Cheaper ma. Unless I go to Australia and find job as a farmer but I'll miss my family, friends and church here.

For now, I'm considering studying part-time in accountancy and intend to do so in the beginning of next year. To work and study part-time is really gonna drain me from my relationship and my ministry. Will need God's strength to pull me through this ...

Nearer, my God, to Thee

Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee!
E'en though it be a cross
That raiseth me:
Still all my song shall be
Nearer, my God! to Thee,
Nearer to Thee.

Though, like the wanderer,
The sun gone down,
Darkness be over me,
My rest a stone;
Yet in my dreams I'd be
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee.

Then let the way appear
Steps unto heaven;
All that Thou sendest me
In mercy given:
Angels to beckon me
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee.

Then with my waking thoughts
Bright with Thy praise,
Out of my stony griefs
Bethel I'll raise;
So by my woes to be
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee.

Or if on joyful wing,
Cleaving the sky,
Sun, moon, and stars forgot,
Upward I fly:
Still all my song shall be,
Nearer, my God, to Thee,
Nearer to Thee.

~Sarah Fuller Adams~